I arrived at school a bit frantic this morning. I had a full morning schedule, but I wasn’t fully prepared because I’d had to plan last night (stupid stupid volleyball tournament!) and I don’t have access to a printer or copier at home. Also, I just refuse to go to that much trouble outside of working hours. So there I was, slaving over the copier, trying to find a way into my locked room (I’d left the keys inside the day before as I was forcibly ushered out of the building to fulfill my role as a silent and cold volleyball spectator), making some tea, and gathering all my materials together, when the vice-principal practically attacked me. He was agitated and was desperately trying to tell me something using only the words “station” and “MNBC.” I was like, okay, now please get out of my way. My co-teacher eventually translated, informing me that—SURPRISE!—I’d have a news team in my class today!! And not only that, but my 3-2 class, the one that makes life not worth living…at least for 80 minutes weekly. Oh, joy. My co-teacher was kind enough to explain to me that everyone was curious about my teaching—local teachers, the school board, and now this news team, like that was supposed to make everything better. I’m not doing anything revolutionary, folks…I just happen to know English, so that’s what we use in the classroom. Though to think of it, I’m sure my teaching methods are radically different. I’ve only ever seen one class and that was long ago. I really don’t know what REAL Korean classrooms look like.
So now I was late, unprepared, and flustered. Luckily, my first two lessons (sixth grade) went well, and so did the first section of third grade. I was hitting things right on and I’d almost forgotten about the news crew when they came a’knockin at my door, midway through my 3-1 class, completely distracting them, of course. The 3-2 teacher came in, posed several insistent questions at me in Korean, and thinking he was trying to bring his horde of monsters in 20 minutes early (they do that sometimes, gd them), I could only think to write the time his class started on the board. I still don’t know what he was saying. Probably trying to tell me that the news crew was coming. I KNOW, they’re in my friggin’ room…if I’m ever clueless, it’s because my co-workers never tell me ANYTHING, not because I’m slow. I guess the kids had been coached by their teacher when the moment finally arrived, because they filed in silently and perfectly and sat motionless while I prepared for class. I wasn’t about to let them rush me…I need my recovery time between doses! And then, of course, the news crew stayed for about 30 seconds and rushed out. I later learned that while I was teaching, everyone else was at a birthday party eating cake. Assholes. But the behavior talk worked well enough—the kids were pretty good for a good 35 minutes—so I was happy. A little sick of chanting the numbers 0-20, but what can you do?
In the afternoon, I had to teach the teachers. Every Thursday I hope they will be too busy and not show up, but there’s been fairly regular attendance since our official start a month ago. Again, I’m not happy about it. I stole this travel lesson online, but I don’t think it went over that well. Perhaps it was too easy, but it’s so hard to judge with them…based on my personal interactions, I’d guess they know only 10 words of English among them! So there goes that brilliant plan of stealing the online book. Well, I can always hope I bombed so badly they’ll never come back…we ended class by looking at the pictures from my trip. They (Kyoung Hee Sam, specifically) asked me where I went and what I did, so I had the brilliant idea of showing them. Perhaps it wasn’t that educational, but it did interest them. Oh, and she found out that I’d never been to Jirisan National Park. From what I could gather, plans are in the works to take me. Yes yes yes yes. I love tour guides…sometimes. At least they’ll take good care of me.
And then there was tkd, which today was an exercise in frustration. We did forms today as a group, which I’m never good at because I get flustered and nervous. I’m slower than everyone else, so I get distracted by their movements. I like to think I’m just more precise, but the fact remains that these kids school me. Is there something about being Korean that makes for stronger memorization abilities, or is it a skill they learn at school? I always thought I had a good memory, but I don’t pick things up like these kids! Even in English class, some of them really amaze me. The ones who don’t know actively choose not to. When I check for understanding, everyone else seems to get it. Would it be the same in America? I have no clue. Anyway, so there I was, trying to remember these forms I knew without hesitation a couple weeks ago, and everyone’s distracting and embarrassing and infuriating me with their helpful hints. Yelling “Kick!” or whatever you just said in Korean is not helpful to me, oh young student of mine! I felt silly getting so sullen in friggin taekwondo, but I was. Life as celebrity sure is rough sometimes—the impromptu photo shoots, the constant attention, the expectations of nonstop performing (how many times have I said hi today, I wonder), the (insincere?) flattery…for someone who has always preferred fading away in the background, who actively avoids attention, who hates performing, it’s been an adjustment, to be sure. But the language and cultural barrier is such that no matter what I do, I am celebrated and the popularity is a nice side benefit. It’s like I get to relive my younger years again, only as the most popular girl in school, and I can’t say I don’t love at least that part of it!